How To Improve A Deteriorating Relationship

“I’m right; you’re wrong.” “You never check in with me first. “You Shout at me”, “You never think before you  talk”” “You ignore me in public.” News flash: These ordinary little annoyances are potentially ruinous for most relationships.  there are ways to stop the downward spiral but first you’ll have to do these things

1. Re-evaluate the reasons you’re together. Go back to the drawing board. Ask yourself: What attracted me to this person to begin with? What qualities did they possess that I found valuable? What made them so amazing? And are they still? Reevaluating the reasons you came together reminds you of the reasons to stay together, and this strengthens your already-existing foundation. Ask your partner what they love and don’t love about you; be open to constructive criticism and self-improvement.

2. There is a right way and a wrong way to communicate. the right way is asking your partner a relevant question, listening to their response, then offering your opinion. The wrong way is overwhelming your partner with your irritations and worries as soon as they walk in from a particularly long workday. Practice effective speech by engaging your loved one in a conversation of their interest. Ask questions that matter to them; people open up when you inquire about their day, an important project, their feelings, etc. Once you’ve listened to what they have to say, offer your side of the story. Stay away from huge conversations in stressful times, and especially in the heat of emotion. Calm down, then approach the topic again. Don’t just sound off with your concerns; go to the core of the matter by drawing your partner into the dialogue first.

3. Do something special together. Perhaps you two have a favorite restaurant you haven’t visited in ages, or you can return to the place where you first fell in love? Being in a physical space where you have powerful memories of strong attachment can reignite passion. Or, you can try something you’ve never tried before. It doesn’t have to be something extraordinary; even sitting on a park bench watching the children play as you hold hands can be magical if love exists.

4.Cut out external influences. Often it is outside voices that creep into our private relationships and brew toxicity. Understand who’s playing a less-than-positive role in your relationship and commit to keeping that person’s energy out! Keep your relationship as private as possible and divulge as little details as you can. Don’t automatically admit your love woes to others. Chances are they don’t hold the answers to your problems. Open up the gateways of communication instead and confess your worries to your partner.

5.Forgive each other. To forgive is to detach — from the bitterness, anger, and animosity holding you back from progress with your partner. Forgo the negative emotions keeping you from true forgiveness. Remind yourself that whatever happened, happened, and that there is no reason to drag the past into your future. Lingering on hurtful memories only aggravates them. Be mindful that forgiveness is a process, not a result, so perform small, daily acts that are reflective of your intent to pardon.

6.Come clean about one thing. We all hold a few secrets that would deeply hurt others if they found out. This is normal. Certain things should simply be kept to ourselves. But honesty can trigger wonders in your partner’s opinion of you. Admitting one secret or mistake to your partner may make them want to open up, too.

7.Set boundaries with each other. And keep your word! If you set a rule for your partner, set a similar one for yourself as well. This means that if your partner promises not to stay out late on a Saturday, you should abide by the same principle. A relationship is a two-way direction. Tell your partner honestly what you would like them to do (or not do), then be prepared to accept the boundaries they set for you, too. Maintaining a relationship within comfortable bounds avoids arguments, explosions, and setbacks. It aids mutual growth if both partners are respectful toward the other’s wishes. It also promotes a sense of security and trust that each is acting in good faith.